Sunday, January 27, 2013

Week 3, a little late

I'm sorry for my absence over the last week.  Believe it or not, we were without internet for a whole week!  Before you start to worry about me, I'll tell you that I wasn't completely disconnected from the cyber world, I did still have my iPhone.  I just wasn't about to try to type up a blog post on it and end up on some website for the "20 funniest autocorrect fails," or "15 most embarrassing autocorrects."  

The ironic thing is that I had this post typed up last Saturday, before our internet went down on Sunday.  I decided to wait to post it because Saturday was still technically part of week 2.  Since we are in week 4 (and since the title "Non-Judgmental January" doesn't really work in February), I'll be doing two posts this week.  

So, without further ado, here is last weeks post.
Week 2 of Non-Judgmental January has almost come to an end, have you done your homework?  Don’t worry, I won’t be quizzing, I’m just wondering if you’ve been following along with me. 
After this week, I can tell you that I’ve definitely found a trend.  I tend to judge in two situations:
1.)    I don’t understand why the person is doing what they’re doing.  I think I can do it a better way, what they’re doing seems pointless to me, or I think I know better.  These are usually the situations in which I would say something like, “That’s stupid,” “Why would you do that?” or “That makes no sense to me.”
2.)    I envy that person in some way, shape or form.  They might be in better shape than me, or maybe they’re living a lifestyle I wish I could live.  Rather than dealing with my jealousy, it’s easier for me to find something about them and pick it apart.  I think this stems from my avid quest to prove everyone who ever said “life isn’t fair” wrong. 
Confessing this to all of you is probably the hardest thing I’ve done yet.  Am I proud of these things?  Absolutely not.  Pretty ugly, if you ask me.  But, I have a clear idea of what I need to work on, and that’s what next week is about.
Next week, the goal is to stop our nasty thoughts as soon as they pop into our heads.  Rather than reveling in them and making ourselves feel better, we’re going to snap our attention to something else.  Easier written than done, right? 
The best way to break a bad habit is to replace it with a new, better habit.  Every time I start to get all high and mighty, I’m going to stop myself and find something positive about that person to focus on.  What if it’s someone you don’t know?  It doesn’t matter if you don’t know the person, find anything you can.  Maybe he’s got a great head of hair, or maybe she’s got a great sense of style.  *It’s almost always someone I don’t know… I’ve found I don’t really judge the people I know, probably because I’m more understanding of their lives and their struggles.* 
The goal here is to find the positive, and focus on that.  Glass half-full, okay? 


  1. I have found that just being more aware of this default in my personality, has been enough to stop the thought almost before it comes out. You are right, it is always someone I don't know. Why would I do that???
    But... now I notice it is other people and what do I do about that. I can't stop other people who are critical about someone or something without knowing them or it. Do I just keep my mouth shut and start advising the offending person that they are being critical without knowing anything about the people or thing? I will have to give that some more thought. Any ideas?

  2. You're right... and that's actually the next thing I'm about to address :) You're one step ahead, my friend!