Thursday, January 17, 2013

Is it Friday yet?

Today was not an easy day.  Who am I kidding?  This week has not been an easy week.  Today was just (hopefully) the peak.  Tomorrow we’ll be on the downhill slide, right?

First, let me start by saying that I’ve always had a tremendous amount of respect for single parents.  Fathers, mothers, grandparents, guardians, all of them.  It doesn’t matter who you are; if you can do it on your own, I tip my (hypothetical) hat to you (I can’t really pull off hats in real life).

This week has been an exercise in humility for me.  For those of you who didn’t know (and let’s be honest: if you’re reading this you’re either my mom or my grandma, so yes, you did know.  Hi mom!), I started a new job on Monday.  That, in itself, was a pretty big deal.  I was leaving behind all of my professional career experience and diving into something completely new and unknown.  I was excited, nervous, hopeful, and completely freaked out.  I hate being the new person; from having to ask where the bathroom is to waiting it out to learn all of the little idiosyncrasies of the office, being new is hard.

Last week, as I was saying my goodbyes and doing the ol’ victory lap at my old job, my dearest Tots reminded me that this was the week he was going to be out of town for training.  All.  Week.  Long.  Now, I can’t be angry with him.  He had scheduled this training long before my new job even came about.  It was just really poor timing.  Either way, I put on a smile (ok, so it might have been more of a forced grimace) as I saw him off on Sunday afternoon, and told myself that this first week at a new job and as a “fake single mom” was going to be just fine.

For the most part, it has been ok.  If you do a body count, we’re all here.  Everyone has all of their fingers and toes, Dexter hasn’t consumed anything poisonous or impassable (to my knowledge), and O has had healthy breakfasts and suppers and plenty of mommy-time.  My to-do list for the week sits on the counter, with only one thing (of about 15) checked off, but I gave up on it after Monday night.

All in all, it was going well.  Just a few minor mishaps and a lot of dirty dishes… until this morning.  Last night was a totally normal night.  8:00 hit, O and I brushed his teeth, read a story, said prayers, and sang his lullaby.  I kissed his shaggy little head and put him down in his crib, to hear nothing from him again until this morning.  He started stirring around 6:30, but fell back asleep for a while (score!  I love those mornings when I can get ready without having my makeup drawer emptied and handed to me piece by piece!).  Around 7:15, I went in to wake him up, only to be greeted by an all-too-familiar, unwelcome scent.  Turning the lights on confirmed it: throw up. 

Let me stop right here and mention that I’m not the designated puke-cleaner-upper in my home.  I can handle poop-duty, snot wiping, mud smearing, and slobber-dripping.  I can clean candle wax out of the carpet or mystery-mess off of the couch, but puke is my true weak point.  Tots, bless his heart, is your man if you’ve got a puke incident.  The guy has a steel stomach.  He does the puke, I can do anything else; I think it was written in our marriage vows. 

I don’t say it often, so I guess it’s a big deal that I’m putting this in writing for everyone to see (Tots, if you only read one of my blog posts, it probably better be this one).  I’m a lucky lady to have as much help from my husband as I do.  This week has opened my eyes to the fact that I can do it on my own, but it really sucks.  And the “it” that I do on my own is much, much smaller than the “it” that I can do when Tots is here to help out.

From little things, like unloading the dishwasher or taking care of the garbage on garbage day, to big things, he’s a pretty good guy to have on my team.  I know I’m not the only one who has missed him.  Dex has been anxiously pacing, whining, and barking at the slightest sounds (burglars, beware) and O has been pointing at the tv remote and asking for Daddy.  I know when he walks in the door, O will grin and run to him with his arms outstretched, and Dex will wag his entire body (boxers apparently are incapable of wagging just their tails) and run circles around his feet.

I think I’ll show him how much I missed him by leaving a huge stack of dishes in the sink and an overflowing trash can in the garage.


  1. Your post today made me laugh! It is NOT fun to handle all the day in, day out stuff by yourself. Thank goodness we don't have to do it too often. I think times like this are to remind us of how special our guys are & how important they are to our families! Like you said, yes we can do it, but we quickly realize we don't really want to!
    I'm sure you rocked as a single mom this week!

    1. Thanks... and you know I couldn't do it without some awesome support from people like you! Just knowing that you're not going to judge me if O's outfit doesn't match or if he's still eating his breakfast when he shows up at your house takes the pressure off in at least one area. :)

  2. Well... I read and I'm not your mom or gma. I actually was told to check out your blog right from the start from my friend who I believe is dating your cousin... I think that's why she told me to check it out. I enjoy reading your updates. I have struggled with depression for years and I can totally understand a ton of what you write about. Im not a mom but my mom is so i have a good idea what your talking about. Thanks for blogging. I just wanted you to know I enjoy reading it. :-)

    1. Thanks for reading, Shelby. I write for people like you (and me). I hope, in one way or another, we can lean on each other for support. We're not alone!

  3. Doing it all by yourself, is not fun, even it if is "only" a week. That is what makes us appreciate our spouses when they return. I hope you took out the trash and did the dishes, because he doesn't want to face them either. All he wants is to see you, O and Dex's smiling faces to realize you missed him as much as he missed you, because a week of being away is not a joy either.
    As long as we are trying to improve ourselves, say a prayer for the husband's and wife's who are serving our country while the other holds things steadfast at home. God Bless them all. xoxo

  4. I like reading about your Mommy moments Jessie. :-) It is hard when Rob is gone (which rarely happens during the week) but sometimes nice to have a weekend of just B and me!

  5. Hello, Jessie. This is not your Mom or Grandma commenting. YAY! This post made me laugh. I feel the same way. It's nice to be put in a situation like this once in a while. It gives a reality check and helps up appreciate all the help we do have. I've been there recently, too, and it wasn't pretty. Love this post!